Finding Peace Within: A Journey to Authentic Living
The peace you seek isn't found outside yourself—it's already within you, waiting to be embodied.
The Nature of Peace
Many of us spend our lives searching for peace as if it were something external to discover. But what if peace isn't something to be found? What if, instead, it's something to be embodied—something we're already made of?
When we believe peace exists outside ourselves, we create a codependent pattern with our world. We tell ourselves: "I feel this way because of something external." Though external factors contribute to our experience, they aren't the root cause of our feelings. Our emotions stem from the stories we tell ourselves, our worldview, our default mode network—the patterns we live within.
It's easy to connect with peace when surrounded by natural beauty—trees, colors, sounds—but the true practice is learning to initiate that state from within rather than depending on external factors.
This is where meditation and mindfulness become essential. I define meditation in its broadest sense as attention with intention. Where are you placing your attention? What is your intention?
Starting with the intention to feel safe in your body—safe to be who you are in each moment—creates a foundation for authentic presence. Whether you're experiencing frustration, sorrow, fear, doubt, grief, joy, or happiness, accepting the fullness of the human experience makes heavy emotions lighter.
The foundation of discord is resistance to what is. When you allow emotions to move through you without resistance, you naturally return to peace—what you're made of.
The Power of Being a Compassionate Witness
Taking time to be silent, allowing whatever arises to come without resistance, staying curious and open as a compassionate witness—this is the path. Emotions move through us like electricity finding its way to ground. Our practice is simply allowing whatever hasn't been processed to find its ground.
All suffering comes from misunderstanding or incomplete understanding. Think about arguments with friends—you have a falling out, then come back together for a real conversation. As you gain insight into each other's perspectives, you realize the misunderstanding that caused the conflict: the stories told, the assumptions made.
When you rest in not knowing—or recognizing that you don't know the complete picture—you become available to freedom from suffering. This openness to understanding, rather than judgment, is the first step.
The Journey Inward
Before attempting to reconnect with someone after conflict, sit with yourself first—not as a critic or judge trying to make yourself right or wrong, but as a compassionate witness.
Every experience and emotion you have is valid. The essential questions are: Where did this come from? Why did it arise? When was the first time I felt this way?
These questions help us see our blind spots—the unconscious hurts we didn't fully process as children that have become limiting beliefs in our default mode networks.
Taking Responsibility for Our Peace
This inner exploration isn't about blaming others, though I’m sure their actions and choices had an impact. Our parents and caretakers were on their own human journeys. The point is that you are now responsible for how you feel. If your goal is to return to peace and freedom, let that remain your focus as you unpack new information.
Stay in the compassionate witness state, not just for yourself but for others. We treat the world the same way we treat ourselves—as above, so below.
Return home compassionately to what's happening within you. Ask yourself what you need—not what others need to do for you. Often, it's simply validation: acknowledging that you were hurt, you weren't seen, you had tried even if you didn't succeed.
Emotional Regulation Through Mindfulness
The practice of meditation helps us stay present to everything within us, recognizing that the mind isn't the problem—it's trying to point us to something beneath the surface. All the stories, fears, worries, and doubts are invitations to deeper understanding.
As you become a compassionate witness without resisting your inner experience, you stop resisting the world around you. You can relax and remain centered.
But this must become a practice because many of us have only practiced resistance, defensiveness, and protection. When we're in victim consciousness, we see everything as an enemy rather than simply an experience—another expression of the mystery of life.
Seeing Clearly
We operate from our emotional state approximately 95% of the time, which explains why things don't always make logical sense. Once we gain clarity in our emotional realm, we can see the world more clearly.
When we're hurt, we see the world through that lens of pain. But when we return to clarity and peace, we can better discern what's true while acknowledging there's always more beneath the surface that we don't have access to.
This emotional evolution—both individual and collective—is messy and challenging. That's why meditation is so valuable. It helps us be still and present with everything arising within us.
The Misconception About Meditation
Many people say, "I can't meditate," misunderstanding what meditation involves. They think they're supposed to be still without any feelings, just peaceful. In reality, when you sit still, all the noise you use to numb yourself disappears, leaving you with your own energy—your thoughts, ideas, misunderstandings, and ungrounded stories.
In this space, you learn to detach. Stories and ideas don't overtake you like waves. You develop meta-awareness—being aware of your thinking without identifying with it. This awareness creates a pause in your daily life, especially when emotionally triggered. Instead of reacting automatically, you pause to process more consciously.
Life will always present challenges. The question is: when those waves come, will you be taken by them, or will you have the surfboard of mindfulness to ride them back to shore?
The Neuroscience of Practice
Meditation literally rewires your brain, changing how your neurons fire and wire together. Every time you pause instead of following old patterns, those circuits weaken. Over time, new patterns connected to self-inquiry, openness, acceptance, and compassion form.
Studies show significant changes after just 6-8 weeks of regular meditation. Many in the Beautiful Souls Community (a mindfulness meditation group I host almost daily) report being surprised by their responses to triggers after several months of daily practice. Situations that would have previously caused them to "lose it" no longer have that power—there isn't even a desire to react that way.
Beyond Peace: Finding Your Authentic Self
Beyond finding peace is finding your authentic self. The real reason we struggle is that too many of us are disconnected from our authenticity. Systems of control keep us in survival mode rather than allowing us to thrive as our unique selves.
Everything we need to become an authentic, embodied, thriving version of ourselves already exists within us. Beyond emotional regulation the deepr questions are: Who am I really? What naturally ignites my soul?
When we ask these questions and follow the lead of our heart wisdom consistently, no matter how small or large the intuitive nudges may be. We realign with authenticity and inner freedom,
Liberation from External Validation
However, you must develop emotional regulation skills first because when you follow your intuition, you'll face criticism. The key is recognizing that others' judgments reflect them, not you. Let go of needing external validation.
Be completely unique—"like no one," as Antonio Porchia wrote. Stop asking others for permission. Learn to be interdependent rather than codependent.
The key to a fulfilled life is sitting with yourself enough to tune into your internal wisdom. Since we operate primarily from our emotional state, that must become our priority. Understanding that who you are naturally is who you're meant to be.
Your Soul's Mission
I hope you find meditation or a practice that allows you to go inward—first to return to the peace you're made of, and second to connect with your soul's mission, moving beyond surviving to thriving.
Your soul's mission might be something quiet and unassuming, but when aligned with it, you move beyond societal paradigms of success and achievement. You connect with an authentic, intrinsic knowing that you are already worthy and valid.
When we align with who we truly are at the deepest level, life becomes fun. Synchronicities appear, things flow, and you find your unique place in the world.
Join us for our upcoming free Creative Essence Webinar on May 17th where we'll experience transformation in the ways that we live by looking to nature and our inner being as a source of wisdom. Register here.